Tag Archives: humor

Menopause Muddle

1 Oct

She saw me coming. I was totally ripe for the picking. When I turned that corner a bell began to ring in that girl’s head. “Yep she is the one……”

I was shopping in Whole Foods without a list. Don’t do that! It is dangerous because it means your bill will double as you will wander through the store looking at everything. I know better and usually have a handy dandy list that send me straight to exactly what I need and no more! I write my list in order of the store’s lay out. I can’t remember important things but I have memorized the layout of every grocery store.

Is that why stores move or “reset” their stock occasionally? So we have to wander around looking for the coffee which is now where the cereal used to be? Force us to look around and treasure hunt our list which is no longer in the correct order? 

I digress………

Perhaps their are minions whose only job is to point out easy marks to the sales reps? Was there a spotlight highlighting me to this young woman?  I think in her training they told her “Look for the middle aged women – they are your target!” 

She asked so innocently, “Would you care for a sample?” I looked down and saw she had “brain toniq” and “trim toniq”  Yep – that’s what every middle aged woman needs – to uncloud her brain and drop 5 pounds. She saw me coming. 

Instead of being insulted – (Hey the truth hurts but it is still the truth) I sampled and I bought both. 

THEY WERE ON SALE! 

So today I am having a “I would like to eat the contents of my refrigerator” moment and remembered the drinks. (Clearly I didn’t need the brain toniq) 

It has no caffeine, no stimulants and no hoodie Just natural herbs and supplements. 

It works!! I am so no compelled to munch away. Sure it could be placebo, but who cares? Its working! 

Before I play Words With Friends I’m going for the brain toniq. 

My oldest son saw the drinks. He just shook his head. Yea, whatever….desperate times call for desperate

Image

yes – I know it is sideways but no matter what I try wordpress likes it that way. Maybe I need the brain toniq.

measures.

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