Another waste of a day!

12 Jan

I remember when……

I would make pasta from scratch. I had three small kids and I would make pasta from scratch. And I sat on various boards and my house was spotless. Ok – the closets were a mess but it looked spotless. I gardened – had an herb garden and a cutting garden. I would put in over a hundred caladium bulbs.

Now…….the day is gone and I didn’t get anything done.

I think it is the lack of schedule. Kids schedule your life. School, diapers, feeding the family, knowing that if  you don’t keep up with your life you will find yourself buried.

Now….it doesn’t feel like it matters.  No one will know if I don’t vacuum today. If I were reading this when I had young ones, I would say “wow, must be nice” But somehow it bothers me.

I guess the only solution is to create a schedule of goals and desires. A bucket list of sorts.  I have things I want to do and yet I see days coming and going with little to show for the day. Maybe it is a sense of accomplishment.

Today I am pulling all the files, I am organizing files and shredding everything I don’t need.  I googled “how long do I need to keep files” There are a lot of websites with answers Seems to be an easy concise list.

I’ve hit Costco and the pet store and cleaned 2 bathrooms. I didn’t get a workout in. Somehow I have got to figure out how to fit that in without it taking over my day. I did a spin class yesterday but felt like I did nothing else.

Maybe when you don’t have kids scheduling your life you have to create a timed schedule. I haven’t been setting an alarm clock. That needs to change.

I once knew a woman who would get up in the morning, get her daughter out the door to get to High School. Then, she would go back to bed. She would get up to watch Young and the Restless, go to Neimans for lunch and shopping then come back home for a nap until her daughter came home. I didn’t envy her. I thought that is what you are going to do with your life?

After producing my daughter’s web series, a  friend of mine  said “Please don’t go back to being a suburban mom. I don’t want to hear about you doing nothing but going to lunch.”  His words echo in my head. Lunch with friends is great. But I really want to do much more.

It may only be organizing for today, but it is a commitment to a project.  I need my paperwork organized. I hate piles and not being able to find things.

Gotta seize the mood, the moment! Shredder here I come.


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