And I thought I was nuts.

11 Jan

  • Does the eerie silence in the house and the leaden feeling in your chest crush you…?
  • Is your husband off playing golf with his mates whilst you are at home in tears?
  • Do you sometimes find yourself setting an extra place at the table for your child who is no longer living with you?

These are just some of the questions from a “Personal Development Coach specializing in Empty Nest Syndrome”

No – I have not set an extra 3 places at the table for children no longer living with me. The problem is  that I don’t want to set the table even for my husband.  Seriously, grab your own damn fork and knife.

But then this coach goes on to let me know that even Aristotle saw that the mother was superfluous in the household, once the children leave.  And, it is only a matter of time before the husband leaves to. I am waiting for a deep voice to boom” Bwaaa haa haa haa haa!” In a Alfred Hitchcock /Edgar Alan Poe  way of course. It is quiet in the house without kids and I think I need background music or a soundtrack for my life.

I think this woman’s psychology in getting women to contact her is to scare the crap out of them.  If you think I am exaggerating,  just read the next excerpt. This next item falls under mistakes mothers of empty nest households make. She writes  “Many mothers who fail to take the right steps during the critical Empty Nest Syndrome either become estranged from their children, or WORSE die forgotten and alone.”

Holy crap – I’m going to die forgotten and alone?  I better rush and sign up for this coaching.  But wait………apparently I don’t even know I have entered a danger zone. At least not consciously.

“So the good news is that it’s not actually you who is feeling so vulnerable and empty… it’s that naughty little critter called your subconscious mind who has thrown your life into upheaval…”

Wow, now that I know it’s not actually me? It is my subconscious mind. Now, I can relax and pour another glass of wine. That will teach that subconscious mind of mine to throw my life into upheaval.  I thought it was the kids all moving away causing my upheaval. Actually, after reading that website, I am going to go do something constructive.

1. Treadmill   2. Clean out another closet. (So far with this strategy I have donated 12 bags to Goodwill and 2 boxes of craft supplies to a Girl Scout troop)

While I am on the treadmill, I will have to come up with a name for my devilish subconscious. I want to address it correctly now that I know it is taking over in a Twilight Zone manner.


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